Happy Habit #4 Take Yourself on A Date

Kicking Perfectionism to the Curb,Positively Inspired,Practicing Happiness

The Happy Habits Series: Habit #4 Take Yourself on a Date

31 Jul , 2015  

This post is part of the Happy Habits Series.  You can find the beginning of the conversation here.  The rest of the habits are here: Habit #1Habit #2Habit #3

Hello, Gorgeous!!  It’s been a lonnng time!  I am excited to be back on the blog and writing to you.  Hope you had a great few months.  My life has been full of chaos and happiness all at the same time.  I will spare you the deets, but let’s just say I have a new home, a new love and lots of big travel plans.  Life is a fabulously hectic adventure, to say the least!

Soooo, let’s get back to Happy-ology 101, shall we?  Where were we?  Oh yes, Habit #4…I love this one!  I had a couple of weeks where I was falling into that space where you worry too much about what others think of you.  It was so timely to look back at Habit #4 and see what my 3 month younger self had to say about the topic of self-love.  If you want to see the original post, you can find it here but I will recap for your reading pleasure.  I said, and I quote…

I really don’t think it is possible to be contagiously happy unless you get comfy spending time alone with yourself.  Take yourself out for a walk or have a relaxing bubble bath.  

 Just like the basics in habit 1, self-love is the main ingredient in the happiness formula.  If you need distractions or approval from others to maintain your good feelings about yourself it leaves you vulnerable [to losing your happy easily].

Have you ever had a time in your life when you forgot to be your own BFF?  It can be so tempting to look to others for your sense of self.  The trouble with this plan is that it doesn’t make a great foundation for a happy/loving relationship with yourself.  There will always be someone who doesn’t approve of you, or someone who wants you to do things her way.  If you look to others to tell you who you are, it will leave you feeling a little lost.   But fear not, if you ever feel this way you can get back on track easily, I promise.  Start by remembering your value.  You are important, beautiful and brilliant.  You deserve to be happy and to be treated with respect and compassion. It’s your job to act like your own friend.  We all want to be loved and happy, so start taking care of yourself like the lovable rockstar you are and it will draw in others and spread more happiness in their lives as well!  Think of yourself as, well, contagious…except this time you are spreading joy instead of the flu.  Go you!!

Need some dating ideas?  Below is a list to get you started.  These are some of my favorite things to do during my alone time.  I like spending time with me.  I can be pretty fun. What about you?  Are you a fun date?  What do you like to do to show you how great you are?

Ten of my Fave Dates

1) watch a favorite movie

2) take a bubble bath

3) go for a long walk or workout

4) get my nails done

5) go get my favorite coffee drink

6) go shopping

7) collect ideas on Pinterest

8) listen to books on Audible

9) take a class or watch a tutorial

10) do craft projects

What I’m Reading: The Pursuit of Perfect by Tal Ben-Shahar– Jen’s take: This book reflects year of research in Positive Psychology, by world-renowned Harvard professor, Tal Ben-Shahar.  The message is that perfectionism is a recipe for unhappiness and a sense of failure while optimalism (healthy perfectionism) and embracing realistic expectations and developing your appreciation of “good enough” is key to happiness and life satisfaction.



P.S.  A big shout out to Nancy at Domesticraft for the beautiful image of a craft project in the making, thanks for sharing your photographer’s eye with the rest of us!

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6 Responses

  1. toni says:

    Hey Jen! I’m so glad to see you’re back at your keyboard again and thanks for the fantastic post!

    Now I shall turn what I’ve read into what I do and I am off to spread some joy (and not the flu!)

  2. Nancy says:

    Hi, Jen!
    Welcome back to blogland! You have been missed!

    I love this post! I kind of forget to do this for my self way too much. Thanks for the thoughtful reminder! :)

  3. Sage Grayson says:

    I love these “self date” ideas! I’d also add making a date to actually DO the stuff we pin on Pinterest. I have a huge list of projects and DIYs I want to try. :)

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